September 14, 2022
Week 101
Emotional State: It’s Raining Dropped Balls
Books, Life & Dropping The Ball
I missed a week, and I don’t regret it. To be honest, I’m not even sure if I have anything to say today either, but here I am, typing away.
I’ve not done anything book related in about 10 days. It’s the longest I’ve gone without writing or editing in two years. And I’m not missing it. The long and short of it is that I am a bit burnt out.
Not on writing, or publishing, or marketing, or even editing, although I’ve done more than my share this year. No, I’m burnt out on life. Everything feels hard, like I’m walking through thick mud and each step costs more energy than the last.
I launched a book – my novella – 9 days ago and I’ve not even generated any enthusiasm to post about it, market it, or really do anything other than the few things I’d already put together. I should be pushing hard to generate enthusiasm and get sales. But I’m not.
And I’m okay with that too.
Sometimes you’ve just got to let go and go with the flow. Rather than forcing it or pushing through it, I’m focusing on other things in life right now – crazy, hectic, hardcore things. That’s probably not helping with my burnt out feelings either, but it is what it is.
To be fair, though, it’s not my current crazy personal life situation that is driving this. I think it’s a larger issue, one that’s been pressing on me for over two years and it finally caught up to me.
I can only juggle for so long before I stop dropping the ball and you know what? I’m dropping the ball everywhere. Like it’s raining the Big Bounce balls (remember those?) and I’m trying not to get brained in the process.
With everything there is a season and I’m in a season of only doing what feels good. Of not stretching myself to the outer limits of my ability. Of honoring my need to just stop.
Will I lose momentum on my books? Maybe. Am I okay with that? Ask me when I restart pushing my books again and find out I’ve slid backwards in views, momentum, and sales.
I keep forgetting I’m a newbie at all of this and to cut myself some slack. So here I am, cutting the slack completely. I’ll retie the threads again, but hopefully they’ll be stronger, happier, and healthier than they would be if I forced it.
At least I hope so.